Read this e-mail.
chime-in on what you think.
Get ready, this is a long one!
Good morning. I was listening to the stories this morning about teen pregnancy on my way into work and wanted to call in so bad, but didn’t know your number! I wanted to speak up for Julie, you all really treated her quite poorly and I felt bad for her. I agree, yes being that young and “doing it on purpose” is (with lack of a better word) crazy, but it wasn’t crazy to her and you have to respect her thoughts, she was quite brave to speak about it and allow for people to persecute her, I give her a lot of credit. I wish I had the opportunity to speak with her when she was online, while I cannot fully understand her wanting a child so bad she “tricked” her boyfriend into getting her pregnant, I can understand her longing to be loved and to have something of her own. I had a friend who contemplated the same thing “I want a baby to have someone who will always love me” were here words, thankfully she listened to me when I flat out replied that you cannot use a child for those purposes, but I also suggested that she see someone, which is my same suggestion for young Julie.
As to the man to telephoned in and ripped her apart, Julie did very much hit the nail right on the head when she stated that he was taking his frustrations for his mother out on her, he was very much projecting his anger and it should’ve been controlled or mediated a little bit more on your end.
I am a Social Worker by profession and wanted to stress the fact that you MUST respect others thoughts, morals, and beliefs. And it was so wrong of the both of you to persecute her and impose your beliefs onto her; regardless of how you feel. How can you think calling her sick and selfish and crazy was appropriate for such a young girl?? Never mind the fact that she is a young mother, you forgot that she is just a kid and teenagers are so vulnerable. A little compassion, understanding, and RESPECT would’ve been nice. If at all possible, you may pass this email along to Julie. I would like for her to gain the ability to go to college and NOT PUT IT OFF, because she has no idea how difficult it is the older you get; and also for her to understand the importance of therapy.
I am 27 years old, in the process of finishing my Master’s degree. I have a great boyfriend who I will marry, and I am so ready for children, however I know that it would not be fair to both myself and my boyfriend (to put our goals and dreams on hold) and for our children not to be set in a steady career and financially capable to support a family on our own. The sad truth is, our combined income is over $100,000 a year and we could never support children on that salary… it’s sad but the truth today. I would also suggest for Julie to talk to someone, I do live and work in the area and would be more than happy to help her find some services.
One last thing, the part about being surprised by 12 year old mothers… it is a grim reality. I previously work in a residential facility for teenagers and one 16 year old boy was born when his mother was 12! It is sad, but happens everyday.
I hope this email opened a new perspective, good luck to Julie and to all the young mothers out there.
Regards,
Alison