You're probably spending too much on your significant other for Christmas

Monday, December 18th

00:30:20

How much should you spend to say "I love you", without going broke and having to eat peanut butter sandwiches for all of December? Whether you've been on one date or have been married for 15 years, it makes a difference. Debbins and Whitney interview guests from different life stages to determine what you should spend! 

Transcript - Not for consumer use. Robot overlords only. Will not be accurate.

How much this really your interactions. Ally not really to sit. How many good mood it's a holiday season you know and worse even money we're trying to save money. Season I could have spent less than I ever have. Although I don't usually spend a lot of money yes in general and holly and the Barlow as I can really do low expectations always my name's Chris Evans and that is the wonderful Whitney Young. And today. We are gonna see are you spending too much money on your significant other. For Christmas you probably are you probably are you probably are and if you're listening to this podcast you're probably you know that and your track. Spend. Too much money any low earth right but it. You also don't want LA compromised the. The thoughtfulness of the get so we're gonna help you out today to try to at least I think the biggest thing to consider is. How much does the length of time you've been dating affect how much you spent. Rabbi yes whether you've been married for thirty years or even dating for four weeks there's a difference right that's right or is it should be. Married for thirty years or dating for thirty minutes right direction you're thirty minutes in your Thursday. And then also late do you screw yourself over by going big parade out. The gate with a big gap like I think you do yeah I think really I really that you do arm and speaker of the the first thing to consider but the wintertime. I know a couple that is the beginning of about two months now yeah. And they're not even sure. If they should get each other gifts she comfortable than she just told me yesterday she's like. I'm I've insurer election I buy him something like yeah I think you should read at this point correct yeah so you gotta gotta think about that. The whole idea of screen yourself over by calling it big right out of the gates yes with a big gift he's a real problem for people. I agree I think like you like we just said you need to set the bar. Well not even look realistic exactly like so. You know adding to his later because I got yes I've got some late cute thoughtful cheap radios Korea later but I got but I am. I feel like if you just started dating you know you're in the honeymoon stage and you're probably gonna be tempted to splurge in light. Really like this person and then I'm trying to like woo them in court them. So I'm gonna go by like this bracelet that I am gonna be paying after the next six months that's not started out that way. Because you constantly may feel like you have to wanna Purcell and even if even if you or on significant other says they don't feel this way. They will. Feel underwhelmed if you buy them a gift the next year that doesn't match up to that gift. Actually if you if you if you bought me like a bottle of Scotch ten out of Scotch by the way great just written down. I like that took it down letting brand editors Greg and the next you've got to the bookmark ideally well. OK if you you know. Like are you concerned I reconnect you concerned by your finances it's one our minds gosh everybody in and you buy bookmarks. Percent so yeah I. Well OK let's do this keep you some facts that I can't this was a survey conducted by the Huffington Post and making this will be a good. Outline for us now by OK so. Nothing to post. Surveyed a bunch of people on and how much they spend on their partners and spending. Occurred at the re earmark and the ten year mark. By both male and female Steiner's I've been through about the ten year mark I wonder if that's because that's when late you need league can spark back the relationship. It's the ten year itch that you know that it does it turn out a seven year it says is the real thing but maybe it's the tax and STD is. Tenure in ten years it's been ten years and it's it's coming out of remission so much creed it's her hope I. I. Overall women spend more than their male counterparts on their significant others shocking to me a little shocking I agree. For for the main reason and I feel like. Gifts for girls are using more expensive and regularly and close girl girl's clothing is more expensive than guys. We where garbage you guys were like nice things well yeah you do where it's you know meet particular bill and I have been trying to get them trying to beat that because it's true. The average amount. Hovered around 200 dollars so each Apple's okay. Each not combined at once so I spent Starbucks she's exactly exactly. A few people spend as much as 800 dollars which is pretty. Up depends on how much you make but if you're listening to this podcast I'm guessing your not like a multi millionaire near we easily and probably not we're gonna get there that's the guardian that's right that's right yeah and hit. And for. Couples have been dating less than a year the average amount is 92 dollars and one relationship specialist even said. The amount of time you've been in a relationship does matter and couples spend. They're they're couples increase an average of 21 dollars every year so those facts or. So the twelve dollars year thing IE I saw this and I decided to some math because this is crazy yeah so let's say let's just say you start dating a 22 years old Jack you get married he lived to be about ninety years old. Okay if our. Love you you've depleted your retirement a PowerPoint wrecked so if you're gift goes up 21 dollars every year than by the end who spent about 14100 bucks every year. On each other. And you can't afford to spend that retirement. Also with inflation but that's crazy it's crazy sept twelve bucks thing and how to do that. So this is a good argument for getting married at like 45 because then there's no way guys you know delay love delay it or just get divorced. Yes that yes. The wife actress save money it's no it's not been good. I don't yeah. Delete abort them. I don't mean I think lake you know we talked about this in and in what was this two episodes ago. About how much you should spend on holiday shopping in general took it set according to one site one point 5% of your annual income so. May be in MacKey she would spend it. Point 5%. On your significant other seems fair so let's say you make 40000 dollars a year point 5% would be 200 dollars which is this they average in the Huffington Post survey I don't think. I don't think 200 bucks is that I think that's actually. It's probably more than I would spend although I'm not in love right now you're not. Mary I'm not I'm not area now I've actually I've never except for there was one girl I was dating the eighth grade it was very serious. They have ever had a girlfriend or on the holidays yeah or count Wednesday's I've really lucked out. Well depends how you look at yeah. My painfully alone pattern up so and it really know how much it would spend those dating someone right that I liked a lot and I was in eighth grade you know exact. I mean you kind of are still need treatment by chart a course layout works so. I can talk in circles all day. About this limit is two people who are like relationship challenged and single. Were to put it I yeah I kind of feel like we need to. We need some help we need some advice random people and are in the situation so now we want to welcome Corey. To the show who is the co host of our morning show here in 98 PX I grew up. Guys and honored to be on here about the last it is an honor your first time on champagne for spare change yet us here. Ends got Corey yeah are. You're one of our our unit Koreans. Eager to it today while you. Wanted to be rare. Like new our relationships. The holidays that you've been dating less than it's been six month yet so it's a very and August at a date and vinegar three months of the crash and I got three on like 43 to go on time. So my question is. Do you even buy something. I'd to a collapse due laps to ought to stay in its relations. 'cause yeah yeah yeah you do yeah I think I don't care how long you've been together like even if it's a like a month or elastic insulting. Negated some interest saying we should get into that more because dampens. When Jennifer's stay and yeah. I think this group myself over by going on for stately two days ago now yet it's like going up and it date late every thirteen. Think we're staying there because he has yeah you're good you don't do any thing you're a jerk. Yeah so OK so at this point you begin to August yet how much. If you don't mind us asking do you think you'll spend on your girl or death for Chris we have already bought everything I'm gonna get perfect what did you buyer a crack so. I economics I spent joining yeah I got up and we don't you don't know how old girlfriends name's Courtney right yet it'll be really this new being. For what I got Rick she's actually searched my house will connect that's. That's a lot yeah. Matt. I'd been at the settlers podcast or. And adults new birth 34 year old snoop proof read gadget actually see my house the final but it does it so it's gonna ridicule under wraps but I. I on spending some of the range of a 175 dollars. Why. That but that's not bomb that's not far off from what we said you you might. One spammers and maybe 200 bucks re losing 200 bucks but. Max average the average for a couple that has been together for less Sudan. The year her. Let's hear you've been dating for less than your average is 92 dollars a a well above that would one's seven and you like this girl I do I do like her and also there's another caveat to this and Jack. Cut how excess. She comes from a wealthy family. So singles are used to very nice things so are you. Are you expecting they are really nice gift from her that's probably going to be more than what you are you expecting a jet no cuts because I thought about that we had a conversation enough because ball that she came from a wealthy family she also is very conscious about spending. That's usually how rich people stay rich is right that's true the right so so you got a conversation like let's cap it at around when I spent that's been it for them aren't perfect. You set the bar yeah yeah which I had to enter a lot about this we talked about it on the show like does that make you cheap if you didn't. But I deal happen but to cap and say you know let's do best because. Then it sets there's you know you're not gonna ruin expectations. May know the locket and sued she's trying to be something that's like. Thousand dollars and look like the cheapest man and other I think that is something good you should do is you should kind of set expectations at the start of the holiday did. Like listen now on clay this or something like this range and let's not go over you know and I that would disable the laws and I think a lot of people. Have a fear of looking cheap of gore or or being judged by their significant other but again. It's a relationship response the talk these things out that's really bad relationship if she judges you yeah you know it so can I ask you something that. Maybe Cortese realistic right now you shoot. And disarm us CA monuments on. Compare that to past girlfriends now I just as much. I probably round around there yeah that a 10250 range a kind that also I also had this happen before where I got a little too eager. And has been a little too much in in my past. There was one instance where I delicate 300 dollar bracelet for this girl that I wasn't really necessarily even. 10 committed went well there are hanging out like this is gonna winner over Steelers and it totally free to route it back. I don't talk about that you can really get you can scare someone you know I don't it's a balance and that's all I'm saying he'd have a conversation of setting limits yes set limits for the time. I kind of the situation that you could theoretically be and Evans if you continue if you go on another day or two with this girl that you just went on a date with. Things could get a little weird if you went out and buy her something like. Rattle them out I don't I don't think it went by her anything honestly yeah. I think you need to hit at least a month before you can start thinking about gets on this could we see you're setting a slow failure. So I saw our first date was two weeks from Christmas Eve clicked and now she's going on around she's on vacation so we're not gonna probably see each other. Mean he wants if if I get a second date it'll be once before Christmas I'm not gonna give her. A gift on the ganymede what we second day I think it or get I don't mean like spend a ton of money can buy. Like even a card like something is a little momenta out now to show that you were thinking about her because that's ultimately. What they care about the most is that awful less faster and yet if you wanna continue to test if you don't care then and now pounce on him. I don't wanna scare off that's the thing that's why diggreel little nap while you get let you ever. Big to put a big bucks and it's wrapped she's like that under Clinton and it's really light she opens it that the key to your place even. Thought I moved in with an annual we've known twelve hour by here's the cracker Jack box ring will you marry me. You know you're a little idea this idea for you is get her a little box and like a movie gift card. Be like next movies on me although cool and setting it up for the next day and it's also a delicate rapid oriented a box of condoms. No I saw giant brain storming out loud. Out of LI you can go online and Amazon can buy an entire drama of loop at all I'd forgotten and this is why haven't had a relationship and six months. That's just tanked so quickly it like just went right down that I don't she never hears this bike yeah. I just got snookered. Corey thank you very much for you answer and say as a someone who's not dating. Thanks Cory made a problem yes I feel like I've I've learned a lot time I'm learned from green I'm going to be single for forever spiritual I'm learning I think. You can learn from Corey. Is that you know here you are here. You're less than a week. Nearly three days in seated I want Ellen on Monday I'm gonna one day at Texas or elect a couple times thanks so he really serious this went on Monday but. You can I think you can not if if by Valentine's Day. You're still seeing this girl then. You'll be able to use squares advice for mound Wednesday if we make the downturns out will be broke yup that's my point I will be speaking of going broke IE. I have a feeling our next guest is gonna be very practical and is. Going to advise against not going broke right when you talk to someone who has. He's on the complete other end of the spectrum has been married. For keep giving guests four decades. That makes it sound so much older than. Eighty years on bank gave. I'd like to welcome on our resident married person like a danger from I 957 ESPN welcome to champagne to spare change thanks for having me. Bomb we'd like to hear your insights into married life gift giving her on the holidays regrets how long you been married. Fifteen years. Correlation thank you. I never had dated for over six months yeah does that yeah he's real mental or adequate so how much typically you spent on not on your wife for Christmas. Like we say this all the time during her show and I really believe this is true for life in any relationship a marriage specifically. Marriage easy continuous negotiations. So popular. A year ago I actually here I have that need some more on a pillow in my area and my man cave just as a reminder that you know it it is continuous negotiation. It's give and it's take. And and that it is true width. Money and how much money you spend now depending on who Europe how your finances are Ers are set up in your relationship like there are couples that. Have their own personal accounts and they don't meddle with them there are couples that. Have a joint account and everything goes through there and ask you which you are I am we have a joint account everything that funnels into one account. A joint accounts so if I'm spending money. It's no secret if she spending money it's no secret so the idea of surprise here's some you think Jared commercials. Anyway dictionary. Does it happen. When your married with a joint account because there is no secret you're not gonna drop a couple grand. On a piece of jewelry for the holidays and not have or know about it right cat she could pay you could pay 2000 dollars in cash for a diamond aren't pulling money from somewhere though Whitney it's you know somewhere you know you're gonna see the money is gauntlet where did at 2000 dollars that we had the bank or on our credit card just go all of a sudden bright surprise here's a piece of jewelry that you didn't really need. Rate and it's also she's kind of line up for herself because her money to. Her right she bought herself the gifts without her consent to a her own money right. So it shouldn't did the other dynamic that that we are talking about is if you're married with children because from the holidays when you have kids. It changes everything when you have two kids and I have two daughters and I don't know the last time I thought about myself for Christmas or my wife for Christmas because really. The holiday is about them and about making memories for event. Okay we know it's funny my dad calls me the terrain because all the money just funnels down into my I'm just to drain yes as the as the kill of the Hamlin. Yeah and I have a brother I'm that are in the interest and I and the drain so that's count as I assume when your kids over the holiday yes absolutely and enjoy about complaining about it like that's. There's nothing better than waking up on Christmas morning and watching their faces light up as are opening up all the great things. That you bought them and all of the things that they asked for from Santa that they that shows up you know underneath the trees all great stuff so. But that said. To answer your question how much money we spend on each other. Zero. A glass our last and this is what we've done in the past like we have a mutual agreement words like. All right we need something. For the house or we need something okay so we look at alike. The latest thing I could think of is an example was like last note two years ago we need a new computer let's go to the Apple Store and let's get an iMac. And let's invest in that together that'll be our purchase that'll be our gift. For Christmas for each other you're telling me you don't even go out and get so much as a box of chocolates for your life for Christmas mission to box of chocolates. Mother is said cook sees Italian cookies we have it's another by the Italian cookie rotation in my house right now is strong. Okay strong today. Tech not I mean obviously we were sold public's way and Chris this week. Tech like right after Thanksgiving the rotation is in effect and you got a tanker what chocolates or do with a bonds are held. How does it's it's a tag and you know just just a reasonable affordable gift Sherrill I will fight each other slippers well by charter and also perfume or Cologne whenever I question how wager how was your object to being changed since kids then did you not mean before the kid did the right. Well when you had kids was at a huge turning point did you used to buy. Different gifts Asher you don't get it didn't happen overnight it's like always have kids now all of a sudden we're not gonna buy each of the gifts anymore but. This is this is a story I'll tell. I'll remind my oldest daughter of the story even the issue is a one needed to embarrass her in and Sunday she'll feel really guilty about this and that's not my attention but the then there was one year where I remember I bought. Oh this is before we had two kids we only had one girl I bought her and I bought sandy both. Matching diamond earrings we have real I'm real I'm an air and so I thought you know what a nice gift something that they'll remembers it you know Merry Christmas matching diamond earrings. And I think my daughter was. 045. And she wore it one of the die if she lost one of the diamond earrings basement at the moral of the story as it's pointless to spend. Crazy money on a gift that would get lost or broken by your kid because they're kids they don't recognize the value of money they don't know. What are these are spending so you know it in all the gifts I've bought his ways well intentioned does that gift was the dumbest purchase ever for the person stupid as well. Maybe for a four year old but not for your I mean I'm sure sandy your life has not lost redundant here but she does. Need diamond earrings like she got so much jewelry. It you know like if she was sick all I really like. I've never herders say I need jewelry I don't really need a Q pare down not now ramping well when you're at Coney Island will. When you're married it sounds like it's more like practical as batter almost like practical becomes the new romantic. Yeah I don't what I like you guys is. Via podcast is that feel like you guys talk very practically pragmatically about how to spend your money. Given where you are in your life and how much money you make and and and I alliger trying to save I mean. Really that's a set up her for life after your married life with kids I mean that's just an adult way. Of viewing how you deal with finances so you wanna be pragmatic and if you training itself that now. That it will be jarring when you do have kids and you look at the credit card bill at the end of December that only god how much money we spent we spoiler children. So what advice would you have for a new were couple couple that's maybe just starting out heating for six months out of luck so the doughnut surprise each other could you probably have separate county probably have your own money. So you know it depends you know what are your field don't go achieve a meaty you know you have the opportunity now. Due to show through a gift something that's thoughtful it doesn't have to be expensive but it can be just thoughtful. Com and if it cost you couple bucks costs a couple bucks my last question Koppel is priceless Mosher. My last question for you is once you think do you think when the girls are out of the house. He thinks standing you're gonna then revert back to lake surprising each other with his kids when the kids are gone Anderson I just think we wanna travel I just think that's you know like that any money that's left from them not being in the house like let's go someplace let's go anywhere let's just go and and as far away from the kids is Boswell. Actually there's there's going to be you know I if I look into the crystal ball to reject a lot of things like I can project might he say when the kids move by the house that's hilarious because I don't think that's happening Whitney. You saw at home right. I don't know. Bottle over here with the young still living in hope to say they're gonna be out of the house I think it's a stretch like I could very easily see my children living in our house. Through college. And possibly beyond so. Which is fine like but to answer question we'll spend money on what surprised her with things probably not. But look what will we spend money on things that we know will we go on trips and will be. Maybe we'll surprise each other with things like that like OK we're gonna go on on a vacation to. This place we look we're gonna lie we know why let's go to Hawaii I think that the point here is you know your wife. And you know that she probably would value that more so that's better spending your money on a trip for the two view it's. You know your partner you have to the bottom line is you wanna be on the same page with your partner whether you wanna spend. 300 dollars each other or not they hate us and yes you know you just have to be on the same. Have goals right I mean if you're in a relationship. And to you guys talk. And nobody wants to talk about finances when they're in relation especially early on in relation nobody wants talk about money. W let's talk about. How much money you savor how much debt you're in or what your launch but you have to talk about that's a yes debacle you have to know how much money do we wanna have sick right. As a couple when we get to this H how much money do we wanna have saved when we talk about retirement how much money do we wanna put into our 401K. How much money do. Sexy no such as that's like dirty talk to me. Yes it IC about it's not a conversation overnight nobody wants to have a conversation but you have to have that conversation right. It's part of the transparency and trust that is developed in a relationship lot of great insight and like not a passion from our reds ordinary person might danger for many pats haven't ESPN thank you so much for joining us. I'm champagne for spare change they strap me. I think I think something we're learning here though is that money. Definitely doesn't really matter. Especially your all that's really. Awful illness that counts I mean like if I was a billionaire I can buy you wouldn't you know like a jet yet about race and I guess that would be nice and he can get definitely need as much I'd do that jets. You know my bare hands. Now envisioning how would in an airplane when you say that you would build I didn't say the size of the jet. I didn't say what it was functional. Paper airplane right but he's got you a build your jet. Thank. I wouldn't ever fly and it but I would put it in a museum. But there really think that laid there really is something Judas. The longer you've been in a relationship especially. Andy even you wanna started off on this note the note of thought illness and practicality and I'm not talking about. Late being cheap and like here's that you know fifteen dollar gift card talking about not like let's say not going over 200 dollars like happened at that. Unsure also doing things that are. Thoughtful instead of like going for that price tag for example. Instead of really expensive like generic Hillary this is not one of the kinds. Bend it like. Somebody else can have to opt for a customized or personalized. Necklace that you got on Etsy for instance like yeah let's say your dating somebody you are you went on a date let's say she's from Texas she's not a let's say she's from taxes and she's really homesick you could buy her. Texas State necklace on and on exceed for like thirty bucks to an idea so well. I like to yet it's almost better than miners amid super expensive I agree because OK listen you go to lake acts. Jewelry store them and you buy this 1000 dollar bracelet that. Is not one of a kind there's many of them refugees spent all this money. On a bracelet like other people have I don't know that is unique it's not Disney it's not as unique so I recommend I'm a big fan of Pepsi and this is not an out I really am a big man and you get an endorsement went on the table and I don't know. About 200 million dollar indoors I might cut that I've got to this. I'll another really cute thing to do is if you have a scale and I'm I don't tuck it like. I think you can sort of decent and tightly you're you're really skilled at something you're an artist. And again like not stick figures by your and you're really in our. Our regular gimme your here say that not do you think that she's she's looking immigrant Nash is this not you. I'm not I should not. Look at should not make something like this like a sharp drop picture. I should I don't advise you make a portrait of the ROL we'll keep you genuinely are an artist you could draw or paint. An original. Leonardo DiCaprio. In Titanic and drop me like when your friend goes but it is. And I and I turn around it's like a stick figure for that to Little League balloons. Rent a lollipop head right exactly. So not bad but like you could try seed they love. They love their dog you could you could draw is beautiful porch at their dog. Or their favorite band or their favorite city. You know yeah your skills videos. Mean I don't know why it is so funny it's like Hardenne. Or did talk through them. You're just see ya it's too ridiculous idea that I'm what you're doing now might do that just and trying to win some like you know comedic point average for the campaign to picture for you it's real. Because she doesn't know so this girl that I battle of one on one date with I mean her seat ever making a mountain out of a mole actually and after this podcast but probably will never see her effort. I should relocate I don't know if you noticed like I really impassioned about dry in IP did you torture. Just like when it out yet the toll that Hanley yeah what do you think. You know I have. So brilliant yeah when a lot I mean it would win comedy points she'd like didn't have the same sense of humor as it was like who pisses. Eighty dollars and they're not close wells remain. Another thing is. Love coupons like we sound boom. Sexual it's not post can I know I'm talking about like him good for one back rub a non sexual background. Is there such a thing. Accra and Everett might not let this conflict that. It looks clear on up like you're out you're at the park and you just stand behind. It's who's like you wanna background at the park and no or better get them back from then on the public long. You know hoping that then then it precludes any kind of inappropriate sexual behavior that again. Is this supposed to be romantic and you really you've just ruined that you polluted that I concluded that so other coupons can be like breakfast in bed and breakfast in bed you bottle make you practice in bad he answered that your. Okay our right. You pick night. OK. I got like that's a and with I mean with computers you can make these really really you know official and yeah definitely. You can bootleg them basically pretty much and finally I eight. I kinda. Came up with this but I also kind of like got it from let's say and then made up my eye on but it's like a special I used gift. Basket full of your significant other's favorite things like their favorite food and candy may be mini bottles of their favorite alcoholic their 21 or older. Inside jokes cartoons souvenirs from your ventures. Like you that I personal stuff like that. It for you. The girl you've been dating could get you like eating that you you and a Monday let it get you a bushel of but he. For your because yes because I do love him and love and yes if anyone knows who they know I love my bananas in a much potassium it would be all banana stuck it would be like banana liquor. Banana banana is a banana shirt a banana hat. Right yeah everything but it. When this giant bananas you can get at lake like the fair those tough things gathered at the ross' to have come on you Kelly yes and he won an associate him silently for Halloween picture. Cool these are all great ideas to bomb so all right so basically. Start small set the Marleau. Don't I don't say is because you guys as don't blow your load I'll. Yeah it doesn't have to be sexual don't blow your work. Any other way. Is there any other meeting. Like lighten your load of groceries yes don't go if you do it in the bag and it's too heavy. You put the milk and it's time to start small for the Marleau. Shoes thoughtful affordable gifts yeah. Over the prices up because that's consistently worth more and these Mormon Bob Hope this race.
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